Today is a beautiful day - it's my Nani's (Biji's) birthday. They say you are not supposed to ask girls their age and my Nani is a true believer of it. She does not recall how old she is, nor are you supposed to prod anybody in the family about it - it's some superstition in which they believe that publically exhilarating long years of existence could attract evil eyes. However, by a fair calculation, she should be celebrating her 95th or 96th birthday today ...(touch wood!).
She is losing her memory but she still has so many stories to narrate. 'I came from a rich family of landlords, we were three sisters and I was the eldest, she tells me. She was made to wear dresses meant for boys beacuse she was the eldest and considered the 'boy' of the house. Unlike the norm those days, she went to school till 8th standard and is conversent with Urdu, Hindi & English. My Nana taught her how to read and write in English. My Nani got married when she was 16 . According to her she was late to marry vis-a-vis norms in those times. There was gestation of 2 years between her engagement and marraige. Nani reveals that my Nana was not her picture of the ideal boy she wanted to marry. She says he wasn't very good looking to what her other sistrs got and his mannerisms (like talking loudly) does not please her much. My Nana was a public servant and there came many priviledges that my Nani got to enjoy -watching parades on 26th January, meeting and shaking hands with the President, getting invited to the private screening of pictures at Rashthapati Bhavan. Nani also remembers her beautiful days in Shimla, where her father-in-law was based. Cold wintry mornings, nature walks at 4am, their house overlooking the valley, the dharamshala they sponspored. She swells with pride on the compliements she got from her father in law for being such a dutiful, respectful daughter-in-law.
Nani is slowing losing memory but she repeatedly narrate incidents of her childhood, married life, her children. She does her prayers twice a day, bathes without fail and even washes her own clothes. Till a few years back she could even cook, but her hands tremble now. She has always been a very practical person with lots of self respect. She told me that she still gets her husband's pension and she is not dependent on anyone.
Today we had a sumptuous dinner - thanks to Mama, Mosi & Laksmi for organising it. I gifted a woollen scarf to my Nani. She nicely draped it, insisting that I shouldn't have bothered as she has a couple in store. Money saved is money earned as she would say.
Over dinner, I asked her if she would come with me if I get a short assignment in Australia. She readily agreed and offered to cook for me when I would go to work...in return all she wanted from me was to give her some directions in the neibhourhood so that she could go for afternoon walks..
I love you Nani.
Wishing you many more beautiful and healthy years.
She is losing her memory but she still has so many stories to narrate. 'I came from a rich family of landlords, we were three sisters and I was the eldest, she tells me. She was made to wear dresses meant for boys beacuse she was the eldest and considered the 'boy' of the house. Unlike the norm those days, she went to school till 8th standard and is conversent with Urdu, Hindi & English. My Nana taught her how to read and write in English. My Nani got married when she was 16 . According to her she was late to marry vis-a-vis norms in those times. There was gestation of 2 years between her engagement and marraige. Nani reveals that my Nana was not her picture of the ideal boy she wanted to marry. She says he wasn't very good looking to what her other sistrs got and his mannerisms (like talking loudly) does not please her much. My Nana was a public servant and there came many priviledges that my Nani got to enjoy -watching parades on 26th January, meeting and shaking hands with the President, getting invited to the private screening of pictures at Rashthapati Bhavan. Nani also remembers her beautiful days in Shimla, where her father-in-law was based. Cold wintry mornings, nature walks at 4am, their house overlooking the valley, the dharamshala they sponspored. She swells with pride on the compliements she got from her father in law for being such a dutiful, respectful daughter-in-law.
Nani is slowing losing memory but she repeatedly narrate incidents of her childhood, married life, her children. She does her prayers twice a day, bathes without fail and even washes her own clothes. Till a few years back she could even cook, but her hands tremble now. She has always been a very practical person with lots of self respect. She told me that she still gets her husband's pension and she is not dependent on anyone.
Today we had a sumptuous dinner - thanks to Mama, Mosi & Laksmi for organising it. I gifted a woollen scarf to my Nani. She nicely draped it, insisting that I shouldn't have bothered as she has a couple in store. Money saved is money earned as she would say.
Over dinner, I asked her if she would come with me if I get a short assignment in Australia. She readily agreed and offered to cook for me when I would go to work...in return all she wanted from me was to give her some directions in the neibhourhood so that she could go for afternoon walks..
I love you Nani.
Wishing you many more beautiful and healthy years.
2 comments:
A very profound post shabs:-)
I also wish biji a very very happy birthday.
It's really amazing how stong minded and resillient our grand folks are. Your story reminded me of my grand mom (mom's side - I think you say, Dadi, forgive my poor knowledge of Hindi despite all efforts). She too insisted on keeping her age to herself, and was fully self sufficient in looking after herself.
I guess, we are victims of the convenience of technology, what with refusing to remember telephone numbers to start with... doing my laundry at 80+ age is a horror, the magnitude of which I fail to grasp.
Keep the great work of writing going. All the best to you in this experimental journey.
Cheers
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